Do Drug Addicts Fall in Love?
Posted Jun 4, 2022
I've experienced "falling in love" a couple of times during my drug addiction. Each time it was with a girl who was also addicted to heroin. These romances started fast and fun but ended in disaster shortly thereafter. Here is what it is like for addicts to fall in love.Drug addicts can fall in love however the type of love that we experience when using drugs differs from that of a non-addict person.
The Initial Attraction
When we are using drugs, we surround ourselves with other addicts. We are constantly meeting new people who are also dealing with drug addiction, and romances can develop.
A romance between addicts starts with an attraction. Here are three things that addicts find appealing when it comes to a potential love interest.
Appearance - In each of the romances I experienced during my addiction, appearance attracted me to the other person. The situation was always the same; I noticed a girl that I thought was beautiful and became attracted to her.
Drugs/Money - The amount of drugs/money that an addict has can also be a driving force in attraction. The more drugs/money a person has, the more attractive they become in the eyes of an addict.
Situation - An addict's situation is a combination of things like their living situation, financial status, and lifestyle. A potential upgrade in situation can be very attractive to an addict.
When we feel an attraction toward another addict, we usually don't hesitate to act on it. Our inhibitions lower when we are high, and this makes it easier for us to make the first move and risk making a fool of ourselves.
An addict's favorite pickup line and the one that I used most often was, "Hey, wanna get high?" It's a great line because you know they are going to say yes, and then you get to show off how awesome you are at doing drugs 😎.
The Dating phase
After an attraction occurs between two addicts we move onto the dating phase. Addicts move quickly in romance. We can go from just meeting to living with a person that very same day.
A new romance in addiction can feel amazing. Your head fills with delusions of how the two of you will conquer the world. Now that you're in love, your life doesn't seem miserable anymore. You can't imagine ever feeling depressed or hopeless again.
When two addicts get together, they form a partnership with the shared mission of making money to buy drugs.
When addicts start dating, they take on the responsibility of the others drug habit. We can no longer only worry about getting enough drugs for ourselves. We have to make sure that we get enough drugs to satisfy both addictions.
There is often an unspoken agreement between couples in addiction that they will evenly split all of the drugs they get. Sharing like this can become a source of tension in the relationship.
When we are able to maintain both partners' drug habits, our romances can go smoothly. We are able to play house and pretend that everything is perfect.
If the money runs out and we can't get the drugs we need, the relationship can sour. We become irritable and mean when we aren't high. We see this other person as a burden rather than a partner. That initial attraction we once felt turns to resentment.
Once this happens, that feeling of being in love never returns. We had all these hopes pinned on the relationship. Things were supposed to be great, and when they aren't, you realize that it was all just a lie you told yourself.
If things continue like this, the relationship can end just as quickly as it started. Breaking up in addiction is not a drawn-out affair. In my experience, one person ends up calling for a ride and leaves the other person behind.
Addicts tend to move on quickly in drug addiction. We don't have time to sit around feeling depressed that things didn't work out. Addiction is a full-time job that requires almost all of our attention.
So that is what it's like for addicts who fall in love. It happens fast. We can go from being strangers to being in love in a matter of days, sometimes hours.
The initial feelings are intense. We imagine a better life for ourselves with this new person. We think now that we have found the one, everything will work out for us. We won't have to feel hopeless and miserable ever again.
Once the drugs run out, things take a turn for the worse. The fighting starts, and what we thought was love quickly turns to resentment. So, we move on and keep getting high.
Eric Anderson is a web developer and recovering drug addict. By sharing his experience in drug addiction and recovery, he hopes to help families who have been impacted by this disease.Learn more about Eric